Ever since I was a young girl I knew that one day I would adopt a child. That desire was never far from my heart. When I met my husband-to-be, Brian in November of 1994, I asked him on our first lunch “date” how he felt about adoption. For me, the willingness to adopt was a non-negotiable. In God’s perfect providence Brian’s older brother was adopted and it was definitely something he wanted to do. We married in September 1995 and I was pregnant by October of 1995. Sadly I miscarried in December, thus beginning a long process of surgeries, pregnancies and more miscarriages. By March of 2001, we had three beautiful girls: newborn, 14 months and 4 years old.
The years went on and with three young girls life was full, challenging and fun. The issue of adoption would still come up but when I was ready Brian wasn’t and vice- versa. In early 2005, while I was alone praying, that strong desire to adopt flooded my heart and my soul. I talked to Brian, we prayed together and both felt that now was the right time for our family. But how and where to start?
I began calling private adoption agencies but nothing seemed like a good fit for us. One afternoon, while shopping at the mall, the Department of Children and Family Services had an information table set up. I talked with the social workers and knew this was to be our path. Katrina delayed us a whole year but we were finally certified by DCFS in 2007 and starting fostering right away. During our first year over 20 precious ones came through our home.
Eventually, a child came into our home whose case looked really good for adoption. This child was with us for 11 months when the toddler was sent home suddenly. It was like a death to me. My heart was shattered and I told Brian I couldn’t do it anymore. A couple of weeks later, I randomly asked Brian if the State called for us to take a child could I say yes. Brian, miraculously, agreed as he normally likes to take his time thinking things through.
The State called that day and asked if we would foster a 6 month old African American baby with some health issues. I said yes and got the house ready, excited to meet this little one. This baby boy was the one to become our son 12 months later. I had the honor of meeting his birth mother, which was so important as Isaac, our son, began to mature and have many questions. Within a month of receiving Isaac, we got a call from a lady who adopted Isaac’s sister. We met and the two have been very close ever since. Isaac turns 13 this year. He is maturing into quite a fine young man, learning to navigate the many challenges that he has faced with grace and dignity. Isaac is an incredible athlete with a fun and quirky sense of humor. Also, being the only boy, he is totally spoiled rotten by his sisters.
We continued to foster thinking we were done adopting. One afternoon we got a call from the State asking us to foster a very sick 7 week old baby girl who was being released from the hospital that day. Our daughter came with many challenges and her future health and capabilities were uncertain. As and already older mom, I was not thinking of adoption as a possibility until one of my friends asked me if I though anyone would want her. At that moment, I knew that I wanted her and so did our whole family. We had fallen in love with her. Aubrie turns 10 this year and has exceeded every expectation. She is brilliant, kind and compassionate. Aubrie is a constant source of joy and laughter in our lives and we could not imagine life without her.
We continue to raise our 5 kiddos and run a non-profit to help meet the needs of children in care. Our family has had the privilege of caring for over 50 children and each one of them has made our lives so much richer.